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Hell Week

Original Air Date: November 23, 1987
Episode #053

MacGyver arrives at the campus of his alma mater, Western Tech, to be the alumni judge for the annual physics competition. Mac's mentor, Professor Ryman, won the first competition and his son, David, is one of the four current finalists. Visiting the professor's physics class, Mac sees Ryman belittle his son for not solving a problem with his project. David shrugs it off, but he is determined to win the contest so that his father will notice him. David shows his friend Janet his contest entry, which he has been losing sleep to work on. However, Jeffrey Kramer, another finalist, eavesdrops to hear how David's project works. The next day, the contest begins: the objective is to create a barricade that stops all of the competitors. The other finalists are eliminated, and Jeffrey and David work to open each other's doors. Jeffrey pretends to be stumped, but as David is about to win, Jeffrey declares that he's figured it out. He opens the door; David is devastated. As the others go to celebrate, Mac lingers to inspect David's barricade. At the party, Mac confronts Jeffrey, and it becomes obvious that he cheated. On the way to tell David that he won, Mac again tries to tell the professor that his son needs help. Professor Ryman doesn't believe it, but as they near David's room, Janet meets them. She says that David is on the phone; he's in the physics lab with a bomb. Mac and the professor arrive at the lab to find that David's rigged the door to keep people out. They can see him inside, drunk. Professor Ryman tries to explain that if the bomb blows, the whole campus is in danger because there is plutonium in the lab above. Before David can react, he passes out. Mac bypasses the trap at the door and hurries over to inspect the bomb. As the timer ticks down, Mac finds that he can't access the bomb to defuse it. He and the professor carefully move it to the elevator to try to contain the blast, but they're trapped inside as well. Mac gets an idea and fries the switch, stopping the bomb. Later, the paramedics take David to an ambulance, and the professor says he'll make time to help his son.


Quotes

David: You sure haven't changed much. That's the same jacket you had ten years ago, isn't it.
MacGyver: Yeah . . . I'm kind of attached to it.

Ryman: I continue to be a little disappointed; those who show a shred of promise flee the fold. There you are, MacGyver, in the physics hall of fame. But where are you, MacGyver?
MacGyver: Happy doing what I'm doing.
Ryman: Nonsense. You should've stayed with physics.
MacGyver: I expanded my horizons, went in other directions.

MacGyver: I saw David outside. How's he doing?
Ryman: B's. He's getting B's. Few A's.
MacGyver: That's not what I mean. How's he doing?
Ryman: Oh. Fine.

Ryman: Come and see the next generation in action. You can be depressed along with me.

[David gives Janet a rose.]
David: I didn't forget. Happy birthday.
Janet: Thanks. It was yesterday.
David: I'm sorry.
Janet: You seem to say that a lot lately.

Janet: You didn't sleep again last night, did you, David. You look awful. You're gonna kill yourself.
David: Well, the thought crossed my mind ...
Janet: Quit talking like that.
David: I'm kidding! Just kidding ...

"Mr. MacGyver is a former student here - though, of course, not in your league. He was gifted." Professor Ryman, introducing Mac to his class

Ryman: Think. For a change.
David: Yeah, well, I need the materials, don't I.
Ryman: Improvise, David!
David: With what?
Ryman: MacGyver could fix it, couldn't you, MacGyver.

Ryman: There's nothing worse than a physicist stupefied by the obvious.

MacGyver: Don't let him get to you.
David: No sweat.

MacGyver: Wasn't that a little rough?
Ryman: Physics is about truth, not tact. I was rough on you, too.
MacGyver: Yes, you were; you were a tyrant. But you humiliated David. He's your son!
Ryman: Well, nobody's going to give him any points for that.

Janet: He has no idea what he's doing to his own son. I mean, it's no wonder David's taking ...
MacGyver: Taking what?
Janet: Nothing.
MacGyver: Janet . . . is David taking drugs?
Janet: Yes, all the time now. He's moody, he doesn't eat, he never sleeps . . . And he jokes about killing himself, and I can't tell if he's serious or not.

MacGyver: Professor, you know, David's been knocking himself out to make his barricade as famous as yours.
Ryman: Really? I'm happy to hear that.
MacGyver: It's put a lot of pressure on him.
Ryman: Pressure, MacGyver, is what turns coal into diamonds.

Janet: You came in second: you did great. Now come on, get some perspective.
David: You know, I used to get mad at my father for not believing in me, but he's right! I am a loser.

Ryman: I hope he's not staying away because he lost.  That's hardly the Ryman way.
MacGyver: What's that? Staying away? Or losing?

Ryman: Every student on this campus, Mr. MacGyver, is pushed to his limits. You know that.
MacGyver: Maybe for David it's too much.

Ryman: My son? Drugs?
MacGyver: Yes, sir. David needs help.
Ryman: Well, I'm sorry. I'm sorry, MacGyver. I don't believe that. Not any of it.
MacGyver: No, sir, you don't, do you. You don't see any of it.

Jeffrey: You all saw it. The door was opened; it was an optical illusion. He used that periscope.
MacGyver: That's right, he did. That's exactly what he did. But you had no way of knowing that. Jeffrey, you opened the door, but you never looked inside. You never saw a periscope - at least, not this afternoon.

MacGyver: He is a kid who is begging you to listen.
Ryman: Nonsense, MacGyver.
MacGyver: Pressure turns coal into diamonds. Is that it?
Ryman: Well, that is a physical fact, MacGyver.
MacGyver: It can also crush it to dust!

Ryman: Are you saying this is my fault?
Janet: You're the one that has the Nobel prize. You figure it out.

David: Janet, I gotta go. If you hear a loud bang, it was just me saying goodbye.

David: When's my birthday?
Ryman: What do you mean?
David: I mean, when's my birthday!

Ryman: Call the bomb squad.
MacGyver: There's no time. We're the bomb squad.

Ryman: Forgive me. I'm a little bit nervous.
MacGyver: I'd be worried if you weren't.

MacGyver: You once said there's no problem without a solution.

Ryman: There's got to be a better way.
MacGyver: If you come up with it, let me know.

Janet: David!
MacGyver: He's gonna be alright. But it's gonna take time.
Ryman: Oh, I'll make the time.


Blow Out

Original Air Date: December 21, 1987
Episode #054

Suffering from a cold, MacGyver visits a supermarket to try a home remedy. His plans change when armed robbers enter; Mac whips up some tear gas and catches them by surprise. Later, he stops at the Phoenix Foundation, where he learns that Nikki Carpenter is officially an employee. Passing a post office on the way to her car, Nikki is knocked down by a man running by; he grabs her wallet and jumps into a getaway car. Furious, she gathers her things and drives away, moments before a bomb blows in the post office. The man who ordered the bomb scolds the wallet-snatcher for being seen; he wants Nikki eliminated before she can identify them. Leaving her apartment to go file a report at the police station, Nikki narrowly avoids being hit by a car. Nikki goes to Mac's houseboat and says that she thinks someone is trying to kill her; Mac suggests checking out enemies from her past, but she doesn't want to pursue it. Concerned, Mac goes to see Pete; he accesses Nikki's file to see if someone from her past could be after her. Mac learns that Nikki's husband died in a car bombing. He goes to Nikki's place where he finds her being strangled by the man who stole her wallet. Mac fights the guy, but he escapes. The next day, Mac realizes that Nikki saw one of the bombers outside the post office; the terrorists have promised that another bomb will go off if their demands aren't met. A clue leads Mac and Nikki to the man she saw: Eric Dunlap. They track him back to a warehouse, but the other bad guys realize Eric was followed, so they kill him. Looking around the warehouse, Mac deduces that the target is the Hall of Justice, and the bad guys have disguised the bomb in a mail truck. The police find the truck and arrest the bad guys as Pete, Mac and Nikki arrive on the scene. However, Mac says that he is unable to stop the bomb. With the timer ticking, he drives the mail truck away, heading for a pier. When the path is blocked by construction, Mac has a truck driver fill the mail truck with cement, which helps contain the blast.


Quotes

MacGyver: Anyone who sounds like this should be home in bed. The fact is, I was . . . but after a weekend of hearing myself sneeze, I was desperate. So here I am, searching for the ingredients to an old home remedy.

MacGyver: Excuse me, can you tell me where I can find some eucalyptus leaves?
Stock Boy: Australia.

MacGyver: I knew I shouldn't have gotten out of bed this morning. My search for a cure for the common cold turned into finding a remedy for robbery.

Pete: I thought you were going to stay home in bed and take care of that cold.
MacGyver: I was. I am. How was I to know I was going to walk into a robbery? Police kept me tied up for hours.
Pete: Well, the hidden cost of heroism.

Nikki: I thought you were home in bed.
MacGyver: I'm workin' on it.

MacGyver: Of course, you understand this doesn't necessarily mean we'll be working together.
Nikki: Oh, of course not.
MacGyver: It's nothing personal here, mind you . . . but we do seem to work in different ways.
Pete: People--
Nikki: That's right. I'm a professional, and you make up stuff as you go along.
MacGyver: Whatever works!

Pete: You, go home and take care of your cold, and you, take the rest of the day off. Just get out of my hair, will you?
[He realizes what he just said and tries to cover by speaking more firmly.]
Pete: Some of us have work to do!

Nikki: I need to talk to you.
MacGyver: You? And me? Talk?

MacGyver: Well, we've all got enemies in this business. You got any heavyweights in your past that could've done this?
Nikki: Well, sure.

Nikki: Oh, I don't want to bother Pete about this. I mean, it's probably a full moon or something ...

MacGyver: Apparently it rattled her enough that she had to come and see me. She started to ask for help, then backed off.
Pete: It wasn't something you said?

Pete: You two amaze me, you know that? She comes to you for help and then won't ask for it. And then you come to me to tell me that you're worried about her. Did you two ever think of having a normal conversation?

Pete: And press the Clear button before you leave.
[Mac sneezes.]
Pete: Or die.

Nikki: I don't want you involved. Do you understand me? I'll just handle this myself.
MacGyver: Nobody gets close to Nikki Carpenter because Nikki's jinxed, is that it?

MacGyver: How much longer can you go on telling people you're divorced? How much longer can you go on blaming yourself?
Nikki: It was my fault. I should've known. It was a mob hit, and that car bomb was meant for me, not him.

Nikki: I can't just sit on my tail and wait for you to solve the problem.
MacGyver: You can keep your tail from gettin' shot off! Will you just let me handle it?
Nikki: How about ... no.

MacGyver: You know, your place is a lot different than I thought it would be.
Nikki: What were you expecting?
MacGyver: I don't know, something a little . . . fluffier, I guess.

"You don't pick this stuff up at your local hardware store." Mac, about the wire that the would-be killer dropped

MacGyver: If I can displace my weight with something that weighs as much or more than I do, I'll be able to step off this thing . . . I think.

"Sure cleared the sinuses." Mac, after the blast throws the metal cabinet he was in

MacGyver: I need you to fill that mail truck up with cement, fast!
Truck Driver: What is this? You kiddin'?
MacGyver: No, I'm not kidding! There's a bomb in it!
Truck Driver: Caught your old lady takin' a special delivery from the mailman, huh? Nice touch. Very original.

Nikki: What if that cement truck hadn't been there?
MacGyver: I'd have gone to Plan B.
Pete: What was that?
MacGyver: I don't know. Plan A worked.


Kill Zone

Original Air Date: January 4, 1988
Episode #055

Wearing protective gear, MacGyver enters a wooded area to retrieve an experiment-gone-wrong from a satellite that crashed. Whatever was on board leaked out and killed every animal for miles. Mac retrieves the small canister and seals it before returning to a Phoenix Foundation test site. Pete Thornton meets with Dr. Sandra Millhouse, the scientist who smuggled her experiment onto the satellite, but she is unrepentant, saying that it was necessary to her work. After inspecting the organism, Dr. Millhouse declares that the simple growth accelerators that she sent up mutated into something she's never seen. The group receives a report of what killed the animals: they died of old age because the organism sped up the aging process. When Pete goes to give his superiors a progress report, Dr. Millhouse explains to MacGyver that she's working to create plants that can grow under harsh conditions in an effort to help end hunger. She believes that this new organism could make her dream possible, but Mac tries to tell her that she went too far. An alarm sounds; the still-growing organism has leached through the seal of its chamber, but Mac is able to reseal it. Pete orders Dr. Millhouse to destroy the organism. At first, she refuses, but she relents and zaps the test tube with a laser. Outside the complex, Pete and Mac realize that she gave up too easily. Mac hurries back inside; through the glass, he sees Dr. Millhouse in her hydroponics lab, but she sees him first and locks him out. She confesses that she took a small sample, saying that she couldn't walk away from such a breakthrough. Unfortunately, her playful dog knocks the sample onto the floor. She cries and holds him as he ages before her eyes. Mac watches in horror as Dr. Millhouse's hair starts to turn gray as well. Pete finds Mac, and a very aged Dr. Millhouse begs them to save her work. Mac rushes to get the disks and hurries back to show her that they'll get them out. She weakly thanks them and dies. Alarms sound about the contamination and a voice reports that the facility will self-destruct. Mac and Pete barely escape before the place explodes.


Quotes

Col. Phelps: When you pulled him out of bed in the middle of the night for this, I wondered if he really knew what he was getting in to.
Pete: He knew the same things all of us knew. I didn't hold anything back from him.
Col. Phelps: Why him, Pete? Why MacGyver?
Pete: Because he has the scientific knowledge and knows how to move fast through rough country. Aside from that he's the best person I know to deal with . . . whatever it is he's going to deal with out there. And he volunteered. Wouldn't have it any other way.

"You can tell your Dr. Millhouse that bug she put in the satellite kills more than just sheep." Mac, walking through the kill zone

Col. Phelps: And Sandra Millhouse feels she can handle all the testing procedures by herself?
Pete: Listen, that young lady thinks she can run the world. What are a few tests on a little superbug?

Pete: "Hello, Pete"? That's it? Sandra, how could you do this?! You smuggled that organism of yours onto a Phoenix satellite!
Dr. Millhouse: It was essential to my work, Pete.
Pete: But you had no clearance! But as usual, Dr. Millhouse knows best, right? The same stunt you pulled with that Dutch elm tree disease two years ago. Haven't you learned anything since then?
Dr. Millhouse: Yes. I've learned that progress will not wait for a bunch of bureaucrats to get off their duffs to make a decision.

Dr. Millhouse: Pete, the information I'm receiving is fantastic. We've got to see this thing through; please don't let them panic.
Pete: You don't even hear me, do you. Sandra, it's over. It stops, right here.

"Set it on medium well." Mac, about to enter the decontamination chamber

Col. Phelps: About Firestorm, I . . . uh--
MacGyver: Not necessary. You had your orders.

Dr. Millhouse: All I sent up was a simple mixture of synthetic growth accelerators - nothing. And it came back something else. Something I've never seen before.
MacGyver: Whatever it is, it's killing things.
Pete: MacGyver, this is Dr. Millhouse.
Dr. Millhouse: Dragon Lady, as I'm sure you've been told.

MacGyver: I saw animals dropped dead on the spot. They didn't get sick, they didn't run off and hide - they just died. Hundreds of them.

Dr. Millhouse: Whatever it is, it's getting stronger.
Pete: What do you mean "stronger"?
Dr. Millhouse: This is so far away from the organism I sent up, we could be dealing with an entirely new form of life here.

Col. Phelps: I just got the pathologists' report on those dead sheep.
Pete: And?
Dr. Millhouse (reading): Arterial blockage, brain malfunction, rapid and sudden muscle deterioration . . my god.
Pete: Well, what does that mean?
MacGyver: They died of old age.

Col. Phelps: Washington wants to discuss its disposition.
Dr. Millhouse: Oh, great. I guess this means we run scared and kill it before we have a chance to understand what it means.

Dr. Millhouse: I suppose you think I'm a crackpot, too.
MacGyver: No, I think you're a dedicated scientist - who's gone too far.

MacGyver: Look, Doctor . . no one is saying your work isn't valid; I'm a big fan of experimentation. But there comes a time when you have to acknowledge a right and a wrong way of doing things.
Dr. Millhouse: Have you ever seen hunger, MacGyver?
MacGyver: Yes, ma'am, I have. I've also seen what an out-of-control experiment can do.

Dr. Millhouse: If you'd watched a child starve to death, or seen old people living on dog food, you might understand what I'm trying to do here.
MacGyver: An end to world hunger; that's it, huh? You know, you're not the only one who wants to see that happen.
Dr. Millhouse: I'm on to something that could make it happen.

"One . . . giant step backwards for mankind. Now, why don't you two go back to where you came from and get the hell out of my lab." Dr. Millhouse, after zapping the test tube with a laser

MacGyver: The things you're trying to do . . . I think they're good things.
Dr. Millhouse: Thank you. But I've decided to go into a different direction. I'm going to develop an organism that eats red tape.

MacGyver: One thing happened here: you saw what was possible. It might take a little longer, but the world's going to hear from you again.
Dr. Millhouse: You can be sure of it.

"Did I ever tell you the story about how she smuggled another bug out of the lab a few years ago?" Pete, about to make a realization

Pete: That's the problem. She doesn't stop. She won't give up.
MacGyver: Yeah, well, she gave up this time.
[They stop and look at each other.]
Pete: What?
MacGyver: She gave up way too easily.

"It's too big a breakthrough. I couldn't just walk away from that." Dr. Millhouse, after Mac catches her with the sample

"I suppose an 'I told you so' is in order." Dr. Millhouse, to Pete as she's about to die


Early Retirement

Original Air Date: January 18, 1988
Episode #056

MacGyver participates in dismantling a nuclear warhead, part of a Phoenix Foundation program for disposing of nuclear weapons. Pete Thornton is in charge of the project, and he is elated when a test run for a team from the Pentagon goes well. Pete's friend - and the chairman of the board - is concerned that Pete is working too hard, but Pete insists that he's fine. The two attend a meeting to discuss the upcoming visit of President Amunde, from a notoriously anti-American country. Matt Webber, the Phoenix Director of Intelligence is convinced that Amunde is a terrorist kingpin; Pete says that there's no proof, and he is optimistic that Amunde wants to discuss peace. Later, Mac and Pete watch as a team works on the second phase of the dismantling process. Unfortunately a pump explodes, killing three people and wounding eight others. Pete accepts full responsibility for the incident, and he resigns. Webber takes over Pete's job. Knowing that Pete checked everything thoroughly, Mac investigates the remnants to see what went wrong, and he finds that the pump was rigged to explode. Mac and Nikki Carpenter go to tell Pete, but he isn't home. Nikki wants to inform Webber, but Mac doesn't trust the guy. Nikki decides to trust her instincts, and she goes to see Webber, unaware that he was the one who sabotaged the pump. He and his friends from the intelligence world plan to grab Amunde and make him reveal the details of his terrorist network. Nikki visits Webber; when she reveals what she and Mac found, Webber pulls a gun on her. Webber's friends take out the guards, grab Amunde, and pull him into a train car. Webber arrives with Nikki and starts to question Amunde. Meanwhile, Mac finds Pete and tells him about the pump. Pete insists that Webber should be the one to investigate. Mac informs Pete about the massive changes that Webber has made, including reassigning people to key positions. Pete recognizes the names; he accesses Webber's computer, and an agenda reveals that President Amunde is the target. Mac and Pete hurry to the train yard, where they see Webber leave one of the cars with Nikki. They free Nikki, and Pete goes after Webber. Webber accuses Pete of growing soft, but Pete retaliates and knocks Webber out. Mac and Nikki deal with the other conspirators and free Amunde. Later, Pete returns to work; still bearing bruises from the fight, he announces plan to take some time off and study karate.


Quotes

MacGyver: Mankind is in the habit of creating its own monsters. And fortunately, once in a while, it also gets the chance to destroy them.

"Our man, MacGyver, is now going in for the bomb's critical assembly. It's a little bit like reaching down the barrel of a gun to get at the bullet." Pete, explaining the process to his visitors

Ed: After spending our youth helping the DSX wage a cold war, isn't it nice to be older, wiser, and part of the peace process?
Pete: Yes, it is. Well for me, that's what the Phoenix Foundation is all about.

Ed: Careful, Peter. Burnout is not a job requirement. We just want you to look after yourself.
Pete: Ed, who beat who at the golf tournament last weekend by five strokes?

Webber: Can anyone here explain to me exactly why President Amunde would want to rub shoulders with us, uh, decadent mongrel dogs?
Pete: I think he wants to open a dialogue. Maybe even take a first step toward reconciliation.

Webber: Amunde and his thug cabinet have just been picking our pocket for technical support. The whole time, he continues to head up a worldwide terrorist campaign.

MacGyver: You just stopped three great shots. It's pathetic. Just pathetic.
Pete: Well, I'm sorry. Whose idea was this in the first place?
MacGyver: Not you. Me. You were amazing.

Pete: I've got a great idea. Why don't we, uh, quit while I'm winning?

Pete: I work a lot; I'm a workaholic, alright? But I'm not a burnout.
MacGyver: No, you're not. But you're gonna be if you don't put some fun in your life.

Webber: The hierarchy of the Phoenix Foundation has this idea that we can help bring about world peace by coddling terrorists.
Akers: You're working for a bunch of idiots. So am I.

Webber: We all know our government's being held hostage by a no-assassination policy. And we all know it's a weak-kneed law that a bunch of Congressional cowards is not about to change. Meanwhile, a kingpin of terrorism gets to waltz right into our backyard and thumb his nose at us - and I don't like it. I say we take him.
Akers: You mean, sanction him?
Webber: I mean, take him. We take him and we shake him until we get the name and place of every lowlife in his terrorist network.

Ed: Do you know how many phone calls I've received from the Department of Energy? The Pentagon? They want somebody's head.
Pete: Well, we both know whose head that should be, don't we.

Pete: Webber's ready. He's a good man. He can more than fill my shoes . . . and he's younger.

Pete: Do I have to tell you everything?
MacGyver: If you want your plants watered, yeah.
[Pete looks.]
MacGyver: I did. Your landlady let me in.

Pete: I've retired. That's all.
MacGyver: You can't, Pete. You're a Type A personality. It's impossible.

MacGyver: It wasn't your fault.
Pete: I don't want to talk about it! You don't ask for - or get - a second chance after something like that.

MacGyver: What are you going to do?
Pete: Oh . . . well . . .I'm going to carry on; what do you think? Listen, I've got plenty to do. I've got more things to do than I'll ever get done.
MacGyver: Like what?
Pete: Oh, like, uh . . . write my book. Work on my boat. Go fishing.
MacGyver: You hate fishing.
Pete: Camping.
MacGyver: You hate camping.

MacGyver: It's not the same without you.
Pete: Look, MacGyver, times change. Things change. It's over for me.

MacGyver: I like being around a guy who knows his limitations.
Pete: Well then we can stop arguing, can't we. Because I've certainly learned mine.

Webber (about Nikki): I hate to have her leave, but I love watchin' her go.

"I'm going to miss his baldness around here." Webber, about Pete

Webber: What do you say. You in, or are you out?
MacGyver: I'm out, Matt. I've got to get some answers first.

Nikki: Are you saying that it was sabotage?
MacGyver: I'm saying it looks like Pete was set up.

Nikki: I've got a chain of command to adhere to.
MacGyver: You know, you are sounding more like a bureaucrat every day.
Nikki: I am one, damn it. Born and bred.
MacGyver: Congratulations.
Nikki: Look, MacGyver, I know enough to know when I'm getting the runaround. Now, why won't you deal with Matt Webber?

MacGyver: Who's sitting in Pete's chair? Webber. Who has a better motive?
Nikki: That was a cheap shot.
MacGyver: Why am I talkin' to you? You're datin' the guy.
Nikki: What has that got to do with it?
MacGyver: Have you read the man's dossier? Have you? You should. Read about all of the special assignments he did for the DSX.

MacGyver: The man is capable, Nikki, of anything.

MacGyver: It's a gut feeling, okay?
Nikki: Fine. You follow your instincts, and I'll follow mine.

"What is this? Are you and Nikki collaborating on the bureaucratic Bible or something?" Mac, after Pete insists that Webber should investigate the pump sabotage

MacGyver: Is it protocol to fire all your division chiefs in a span of a week?
Pete: What?
MacGyver: Is it protocol to scrap your whole agenda the day after you leave the Foundation?

Pete: Why's he doing this?
MacGyver: Let's take a look at his operations agenda. Got a password?
Pete: Yeah. "Agenda."

Nikki: MacGyver was right about you.
Webber: Well, if you value his opinion so much, maybe I can bury you side by side, my dear.

Pete: I'm going back to school.
MacGyver: School?
Pete: That's right. Karate school. This is the last time that anybody decks me with their foot.


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