MacGyver » Season 7
Episodes 126 - 129 130 - 133 134 - 137 138 - 139
The Coltons
Original Air Date: October 14, 1991
Episode #130
Bounty hunter Jesse Colton, with a little help from his brother Frank and their friend MacGyver, brings down a group of counterfeiters. Not much later, Johnny Denmark, assistant district attorney, calls on Jesse and Frank to assist in finding a missing person: a young woman known as Medusa. Medusa's boyfriend, a crime syndicate leader in Chinatown, was gunned down by Chi, a man who wants to be the new godfather, and Medusa is the only witness to the crime. Investigating at a social club in Chinatown, Frank and Jesse learn the girl's real name. Mrs. Colton aids her sons by using her connections to track the girl down at a yacht club. To prove himself ready to join the family bounty-hunting business, the youngest Colton brother, Billy, also goes to the yacht club with Frog, the bulldog, in tow. Outside the restaurant, two Asian gunmen report Frank and Jesse's arrival to Chi, who orders them to kill both the girl and the Coltons. Billy sees the gunmen and follows after retrieving a shotgun from Jesse's van. As Frank and Jesse approach Patricia Fielding -- aka Medusa -- and her parents, offering their help, Frog attacks one of the Asians outside, causing his gun blast to shatter a window. Frank charges outside and subdues him. The other gunman enters the building and starts firing; Jesse, Patricia and the other restaurant patrons take cover behind tables. Billy arrives, and Jesse uses the shotgun to drop a chandelier on the would-be assassin. Terrified, Patricia escapes during the commotion, but soon Patricia's mother decides to trust the Coltons and reveals her location. After evading another pair of followers, Frank and Jesse start to piece together the clues. Frank calls home; Mr. Denmark is there, and Frank reports that they have found Patricia. Mr. Denmark sends them to meet his associate. However, at Frank's instruction, Billy gets the number Mr. Denmark called, and Mrs. Colton tracks its location to a club in Chinatown. Billy heads out with Frog to find Frank and Jesse. At the meet, Chi's men grab Frank, Jesse, and Patricia, but Frank and Jesse manage to escape by using Frog as a distraction. In a building nearby, Billy discovers migrant workers unpacking drugs hidden in a load of figurines. Posing as one of the workers, Billy is caught. Chi demands that Mr. Denmark shoot Billy and Patricia, to seal their partnership. As policemen gather outside with Mrs. Colton, Frank and Jesse bust in and knock out Chi and Mr. Denmark. Billy dispatches Chi's henchman. Later, having shut down Chi's operation and exposed Johnny Denmark's criminal connections, the Coltons expand their business to include private investigator services.
Quotes
Egan: But I shot you.
Jesse: Yeah, Egan. Right in the bulletproof vest.
MacGyver: That's sulfuric acid. It'll eat right through these ropes if we can get to it.
Frank (glumly practical): But we can't. So it ain't.
Frank: What'll that stuff do to your skin?
MacGyver: Nothin' - if I keep it on the rope.
"I know because I'm three years, eight months, six days older than you are, therefore wiser than you are, little brother." Frank, to Jesse
"There comes a time when chronological age and wisdom catch up. In our case, that happened when you was about four years old." Jesse, to Frank
"He's in the door-shakin' business." a cop, seeing that Jesse is a bounty hunter
"You've got a lousy bedside manner with everybody." Frank, to Jesse
"Not you. The nice one." The Ho Ho Club hostess, to Jesse
"You gather more with honey than you do with vinegar. Didn't I teach you that?" Mama Colton, to Jesse
"I'm just gonna have to prove I'm ready." Billy, with a sentence that rarely precedes anything good
Mr. Fielding: You have become little more than a... whore!
Patricia: Then I guess we're not so different after all, are we, Daddy?
Billy (about the gunman): I can't see him!
Jesse: No need to.
[He shoots the chandelier above the gunman.]
Mama Colton (calling after her son): Billy, if you get hurt, I'm gonna whack you across your head!
Jesse: You wear your vest this morning?
Frank (opening one eye): Like mama said, "Never leave home without it."
Jesse (to Frog): Where's Billy?
[Frog sits and looks away.]
Frank: That means he doesn't know.
Officer: Your boys sure got a strange way of operatin', Mrs. Colton.
Mama Colton: But they do get the job done, don't they.
Walking Dead
Original Air Date: October 21, 1991
Episode #131
As MacGyver is shopping in the neighborhood known as Little Haiti, a young woman named Cherine is abducted in broad daylight. The police investigate, but no one will admit to seeing anything: even Cherine's Aunt Denise refuses to help them. The officer explains to Mac that someone is scaring the neighborhood into silence, despite rising crime. Denise confides to Mac that the Tontons Macoutes - secret police from Haiti - have taken Cherine. Since a voodoo doll was left as a warning, Mac visits Mama Lorraine, a priestess of the vodun religion. Mama takes him to meet Dr. Redempteur, a speaker at Cherine's college. Dr. Redempteur explains that Cherine was organizing protests to help stop the former Duvalier government from gaining power in the United States. Elsewhere, Cherine is taken to Devereaux, who worked for Duvalier. Devereaux blows a powdery substance in Cherine's face, and it renders her lifeless. Meanwhile, clues from the doll lead Mac and Mama to the location of the secret meetings that Dr. Redempteur spoke of. Mama recognizes a man with a connection to Colonel Devereaux. Mac and Mama see Cherine and sneak in to help her, but they are caught. To blackmail Mama into playing along with their charade (and win followers), Devereaux poisons Mac with the same substance used on Cherine. Fortunately, before henchmen take Mac away, Mama slips him an antidote. He escapes and returns to Mama's place, where Dr. Redempteur arrives -- and pulls a gun. Working for Devereaux, the doctor's job was to gain the trust of the students. Mac uses flash powder as a distraction and knocks out Dr. Redempteur before hurrying back to help Mama. While Mama performs the ceremony to revive Cherine, Mac sets up an escape. He knocks out Devereaux and takes Devereaux's place on stage, telling the would-be followers that they've been lied to. Mama confirms this as the truth. As Devereaux's men move toward them, Mac enacts his plan and escapes with Mama and Cherine. Several days later, Mac has fully recovered from the poison, and Mama declares that he owes the gods a goat for his good luck. She adds that he shouldn't worry: she told them he is a vegetarian.
Read the extended summary of this episode for more details!
Quotes
"Your niece has some very... dangerous ideas." Concassuer, to Denise
Denise: She cannot hurt you.
Concassuer: But she knows disrespect.
Denise: You would not understand.
MacGyver: Your niece has been kidnapped and you won't help the police find her? You're right. I *don't* understand.
"Let the pain flow from you." Mama Lorraine, to her client
MacGyver: What if something was really wrong with that guy?
Mama Lorraine: I send him to the free clinic! I'm no doctor, MacGyver. I am a--
Mac/Mama: --spiritual advisor.
MacGyver: I think it connects to the voodoo religion.
Mama Lorraine (looks at the doll): That is not religion. That is *sacrilege.*
Mama Lorraine: It means a curse has been placed on Cherine.
MacGyver: One of the guys who took Cherine mentioned a name, a... Baron Samedi?
Dr. Redempteur: In the vodun belief, Baron Samedi is the keeper of the graveyard, lord of the dead and the undead.
MacGyver: "Undead"?
Mama Lorraine: Zombies.
Dr. Redempteur: A precise dose of the right toxins can produce a coma state, which is nearly impossible to distinguish from death.
Devereaux: You do not pay your respects to Baron Samedi, girl?
Cherine: You're no spirit. Your name's Devereaux. You used to be one of Duvalier's puppets.
Devereaux: But now *I* am pulling the strings.
[Mac and Mama see Cherine in a casket.]
MacGyver: She looked dead.
Mama Lorraine: Not dead. Worse.
MacGyver: So... what? She's been poisoned? Drugged? What?
Mama Lorraine: An ancient formula. It renders the victim lifeless. Only the mind remains conscious. Cherine will be aware of everything, until death.
MacGyver: Well, is there an antidote?
Mama Lorraine: Yes. Datura leaf. But more than this -- and in time.
Mama Lorraine: Maybe it would be wiser if you went back.
MacGyver: What, are you crazy? I'm *dying* to meet this Samedi myself.
Mama Lorraine (looking up): Spare him. He doesn't understand!
Devereaux (about Mac): Even now he can feel his joints stiffen, his muscles freezing like ice. Soon he will hear his own heart beating slower and slower until it stops... or until he is given the antidote. That choice is yours, Mama.
"I am a priestess, not a showgirl!" Mama's response, when Devereaux wants her to perform the ceremony
Devereaux (with mock concern, about Mac): How can you watch him suffer like this?
Mama Lorraine: I'll do it. But if you cross me, I will show you more than chemistry and acting.
"That's the poison in blowfish. Like the ones in your office." Mac, to Dr. Redempteur
MacGyver: So, are you on Devereaux's payroll, or is he controlling you with a voodoo doll?
Dr. Redempteur: Really, MacGyver. Don't tell me you believe that superstition.
MacGyver: Well, I like to keep an open mind.
"Come on, girl. Don't let it win." Mama, to Cherine
"They possess no magic, only greed." Mac, posing as Baron Samedi to out Devereaux as a fraud
MacGyver: With all due respect, Mama, I think the courts will put them away before the spirits do.
Mama Lorraine: With all your luck, you owe the spirits a goat.
MacGyver: A goat?
Mama Lorraine: But don't worry. I told them you are a vegetarian.
Good Knight MacGyver (Part 1)
Original Air Date: November 4, 1991
Episode #132
Genealogist Dr. Irwin Malcolm reveals that MacGyver's family history closely resembles that of the M'Iver name, which can be traced through the fourteenth century. Even poems as far back as the seventh century contain references to an Ian M'Iver who died imprisoned for crimes he didn't commit. As they leave Dr. Malcolm's, Pete Thornton is impressed with Mac's roots, but Mac is skeptical, dismissing Dr. Malcolm's methods as "not very scientific." Glancing down the sidewalk, Mac sees a tuxedoed man working quickly to finish getting ready, unaware that people are moving furniture on the fire escape above him. The movers bump a flower pot from its perch on the railing, and Mac is knocked unconscious when he shoves the tuxedoed man to safety.
Mac awakes in the middle of a knightly joust in Camelot. Sir Galahad is wounded by Sir Duncan and is unable to continue in the contest, and so Mac is drafted to take Galahad's place in the second round. Dodging Duncan's lance, Mac uses a rope to jerk Duncan from his horse. The other knights congratulate Mac on his win as Merlin the sorcerer glares suspiciously at the newcomer.
Back at the camp, King Arthur -- who looks a lot like Pete -- scolds the knights for fighting among themselves while their common enemy, Queen Morgana, is developing a powerful new weapon. The king then commends Mac for saving Galahad. Mac begins to introduce himself, but the mere mention of his name is met with hostility. The king explains that the M'Iver name is not even spoken because of Ian M'Iver's partnership with Morgana. Recalling what Dr. Malcolm said, Mac declares that his ancestor was wrongly accused. However, Mac's reference to a future time gets him accused by Merlin of possessing evil magic, and the king suggests a challenge between Merlin and Mac. Merlin attempts to show off with a few parlor tricks, but Mac bests him each time. King Arthur is pleased, but as he begins to expound on his plans to go against Morgana, he collapses.
Realizing that the king has been poisoned, Mac concocts a remedy. Recovering, King Arthur asks to speak to Mac alone and confides that Morgana will test her new weapon on her prisoner -- Galahad's betrothed -- Cecilia. The king asks Mac to help stop Morgana and, in so doing, perhaps Mac can restore the M'Iver family honor.
Meanwhile, the others find the page who prepared Arthur's food, and Duncan kills the boy immediately. Duncan also provides evidence that the page was working with Merlin, and the knights take Merlin to trial, despite his protests of innocence. Using Merlin's chemicals, Mac can prove the wizard is not guilty. Hurrying to the trial, Mac saves Merlin from execution and reveals to the group that Duncan obtained the poison. Outed as the traitor, Duncan flees.
Later, as Mac and Merlin prepare to go against Morgana, King Arthur gives Mac the royal favor -- a necklace containing a small scroll -- to show that Mac is now a knight of the highest caliber.
On the journey, as Mac and Merlin enter a cave as they near Morgana's lair. Defiant, Merlin charges ahead shouting threats against Duncan. Suddenly, a trap door gives way under them, but Mac and Merlin manage to grab onto it. As they hang precariously above a bed of hot lava, Duncan appears above them, taunting their misfortune. However, he is abruptly shoved forward and falls past them to his death. It's Morgana's turn to taunt Merlin and Mac until she turns and leaves them to their fate.
Quotes
Dr. Malcolm: Now, the MacGyver name disappears somewhere in the seventeenth century. But the M'Iver clan can be traced all the way back to the fourteenth century.
MacGyver: Is there any proof this M'Iver clan has anything to do with my family?
Dr. Malcolm: We've got the strongest of indications. We're talking about a time of limited population. Now, the similarity of the two names alone - M'Iver and MacGyver - is enough to indicate kinship.
Dr. Malcolm: The first recorded chief of the clan in the fourteenth century, Ian M'Iver, shares the same first name with his seventeenth century counterpart, Ian MacGyver.
Dr. Malcolm: Both men gave their son the same first name as you have, Mr. MacGyver, and that, dear boy, is more than coincidence.
Dr. Malcolm: There's more to it than that. See for yourself.
[He offers a scroll, and Mac reads.]
MacGyver: The *seventh* century? They hardly kept records back then.
Dr. Malcolm: My search has lead me to mysterious references of yet another Ian M'Iver.
Dr. Malcolm: They tell of a man who fell prey to great evil and died shackled in a dungeon, a victim of wrongful captivity. And, before you even ask, I'll tell you: the answer's "Yes." The seventh-century Ian M'Iver's son also had your first name.
Pete (about Dr. Malcolm): He found whole generations of my ancestors I didn't even know I had.
MacGyver (skeptical): Yeah, I'll bet.
MacGyver (to Duncan): You can't kill Sir Galahad. It'll screw up history.
MacGyver: Galahad's going to lead a quest to find the Holy Grail. He can't die.
"Beware, Duncan. I sense demon magic." Merlin, after seeing the awesome mystery of Mac's zippered jacket
Galahad: Use my armor, friend.
MacGyver: It looks a little heavy. Keep it, thanks.
"I like this not at all." a suspicious Merlin, after Mac wins the other knights' approval by defeating Duncan in the joust
[King Arthur arrives.]
MacGyver: Hey, Pete!
Galahad: Stay your tongue - kneel! Do not address Arthur in such a manner. He is our king.
MacGyver: When did he lose his eyesight?
Galahad: In an ambush by Queen Morgana last year. She abducted my betrothed, Cecilia, and left King Arthur for dead.
"Thank you, Sir Duncan. Now, please. Honor me with your silence." King Arthur, with the polite way to say "Zip it!"
King Arthur: Though you say it strangely, the M'Iver name is banished - even from pronouncement - on pain of death.
MacGyver: Can I ask why?
King Arthur: Because of the treacherous union of Ian M'Iver and my half-sister, the evil Morgana.
"Let me be the one to spill his vile blood." Duncan, holding a sword to Mac's throat
King Arthur: Show us some *good* magic, stranger. Some magic of creation. Or, by this court, you must die.
MacGyver: You guys are so strict.
[Merlin chants and waves an object over the groaning King Arthur.]
MacGyver: What is that supposed to do?
Merlin: Watch and learn.
"He's going to need more than a song." Mac, realizing that the king has been poisoned
MacGyver: I was there; when did you find that?
Duncan: We searched the traitor's clothing before he was buried.
"Make yourself comfortable, why don't you. My home is your home. Apparently." Merlin, as Mac arrives and pulls items from Merlin's shelves
[Mac explains how he's trying to help prove Merlin's innocence.]
Merlin (grumbling): Dragon drunge.
MacGyver: You're going to have to tell me what that means, some day.
MacGyver: ... so I'm making an electrophoresis.
Merlin: Is that Greek?
MacGyver: No, it's a machine.
Merlin: What's a machine?
MacGyver: I knew you were going to ask that...
MacGyver: Here goes nothing. Keep your fingers crossed.
Merlin: "Here goes nothing"? "Keep your finger crossed"? My life is in the balance and you talk riddles?
MacGyver: Clichés, actually.
"Hear me, Hector! I will conjure dark curses and haunt you into eternity. One spark, Hector, your fingers will rot; your eyeballs will spin in your head. Your innards will melt with the flames of my fire!" Merlin, hoping to avoid being burned at the stake
"As a very good playwright will say one day, Duncan, 'Methinks thou doth protest too much!'" Mac, revealing the real traitor
King Arthur: You take neither sword nor shield?
MacGyver: I like to travel lightly.
[Mac and Merlin enter the cave.]
MacGyver: Wow, what a stink!
Merlin: The vapors of Bog. Forever marking the site of his demise.
MacGyver: Some legacy.
Duncan: I must apologize, but Queen Morgana is expecting my presence. If not for you I could've brought her Arthur's head as proof and claimed the fair Cecilia as my reward. Now I must lie.
Queen Morgana (watching Duncan perish): I hate liars.
"If it gets too difficult, remember. You can always... let go!" Morgana, as Mac and Merlin cling to the trap door
Good Knight MacGyver (Part 2)
Original Air Date: November 11, 1991
Episode #133
The journey to confront Queen Morgana proves dangerous, and MacGyver and Merlin narrowly escape with their lives. They also face trouble from within as the repeated success of Mac's ideas brings Merlin to jealousy and self-doubt. Meanwhile, Morgana works to complete her new weapon, which plays a key part in her vision to take over not only King Arthur's throne but also the entire world. Mac and Merlin finally reach Morgana's castle. As they enter the lab, the smell of gunpowder informs a horrified Mac that Morgana's new weapon is a gun. Hearing Cecilia call from the dungeon, Mac and Merlin release her from her cell. She insists they help her fellow prisoner: Ian M'Iver! Unfortunately, after Morgana's abuse, Ian is dying. With his last breath, he implores his rescuers to find his son and tell him that Ian is innocent. Ian dies before he can reveal his son's name, but Cecilia knows of a secret message that Ian left for his son. The message is hidden and in code, but Mac deciphers it, and they learn that Ian's son has the same first name as Mac: Angus. Unfortunately, Morgana arrives and secures Mac, Merlin, and Cecilia in the cell before leaving to finalize - and test - her deadly new invention. Using what's available, Mac fashions a kite and floats it out of the window into the stormy night sky. Morgana soon returns with a gun in hand, but she inadvertently stands on the cord that Mac has extended from the kite through the lock on the cell and down the stairs to the lab. Lighting strikes, blowing the lock and knocking Morgana down before igniting the chemicals in the lab. Mac, Merlin, and Cecilia hurry out of the dungeon, but Morgana quickly gets up and follows, furious over the loss of her research. Cornered at the main door, Morgana aims her gun at Mac and fires. The force of the blast propels her back into the lab, and she is caught in another explosion. However, her bullet hits Mac in the forehead, and he slumps to the ground as Merlin and Cecilia hurry to his side.
Mac wakes in the present on the same sidewalk where he lost consciousness. An emergency medical technician, who looks like Merlin, is finishing the application of a bandage to the same spot where Morgana's bullet struck in Mac's dream. The bride and groom - Cecilia and Galahad - thank Mac for saving the groom's life. Still dazed from the ordeal, Mac reaches into the pocket of his jeans and pulls out the royal favor that King Arthur gave him.
Quotes
MacGyver: I'm gonna swivel around and lie across the pivot point.
Merlin: "Swivel"? "Pivot point"? Speak English!
"Man! You could use a deodorant." Mac, getting too close to Merlin for comfort during an escape
MacGyver: You just about dumped me!
Merlin: A just fate if you ask me. I find you despicable.
MacGyver: I just saved your life!
Merlin: Of course you did. Show off! You're always grabbing attention.
MacGyver: What?!
"I am Merlin, King Arthur's magician. Those are the feats they expect me to perform. I've never had to contend with a rival."
"I am not your rival; I do *not* want your job. Be-LIEVE me." Mac, setting Merlin straight
"Gratitude." Mac, when Merlin storms off after his snit
"Fall asleep and I'll have your eyelids." Morgana, to one of her guards
"Keep your 'science' for Morgana. We'll need all we can get, since you're not offering much in the way of armament." Merlin, dissing Mac's refusal to carry weapons
"When I arm the lowly visigoths with killing machines, the mighty Moors will fall, and all of Hispania will be mine. Then, we will march on Rome and demand their surrender, and I will control all the trade routes to China." Morgana, thinking big
Merlin: In the face of danger, one must react.
MacGyver: Reacting's good, yes.
Merlin: I certainly wasn't frightened, if that's what you were thinking.
"Whatever you do, *don't* 'react.'" Mac, to Merlin when they're faced with a large angry dog
"An alchemically strategic maneuver. Brilliant, if I do say so." Merlin, covering himself in stinky green slime
Merlin: This ploy will repel any creature on earth.
MacGyver (disgusted by the smell): You can say that again.
Merlin: This ploy will repel any creature on earth.
Merlin: Spread this on your skin.
MacGyver: Are you kidding? You'd be arrested for putting that in the sewer. Besides, I think the stench is making him madder.
MacGyver: I think this'll work.
Merlin: Naturally. It's *your* idea. It must be superior.
MacGyver: Merlin, I swear to you, if this doesn't work, I'll try your muck.
"This is madness. Invisible music." Merlin, about Mac's dog whistle
Merlin: You should know. You're about to confront the evil Morgana with a used-up sorcerer.
"Now you have the magic of wisdom to go along with everything else." Mac, giving Merlin a pep talk
"Well, it is only natural, I suppose." Merlin, back to his conceited self after learning that history will record him as the greatest magician ever
"I always wondered who invented that." Mac, when Merlin uses a credit-card-like plate to open a lock
MacGyver: It smells like gunpowder.
Merlin: What's gunpowder?
MacGyver: Nothing you'll ever miss.
MacGyver: She's done it. God forbid, she's done it.
MacGyver: Morgana's discovered gunpowder, hundreds of years before the Chinese.
"I have an ancient potion which will deliver him to deepest sleep." Merlin, before knocking the guard out with a small club
"Walk in love, walk in service and you will walk in honor. My beloved son, Angus"
"We might as well clean the dungeons while we're at it," Merlin, after Mac asks him to polish Cecilia's silver comb
MacGyver: Malcom was right about everything. We have the same first name.
Cecilia: Oh, it's a beautiful name.
MacGyver: Maybe in your time, but where I'm from...
MacGyver: Merlin, how you doin'?
Merlin: How does it look? I am naked, I am humiliated, and I have cut up my robe like some witless fool.
MacGyver: Trust me on this. Another great wizard named Ben Franklin perfected this trick.
Merlin (dismissively): Never heard of him.
"Take your time. I want it to be your personal favorite." Morgana, to the unsuspecting flunkie who's about to choose the bullet that will kill him
MacGyver: Keep your fingers crossed.
Merlin (to Cecilia): He says strange things like that all the time.
Morgana: Yes. The M'Iver defiance. I knew there was something about you I despised.
MacGyver: I wouldn't have it any other way.
Episodes 126 - 129 130 - 133 134 - 137 138 - 139
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