MacGyver » Season 4
The Secret of Parker House
Original Air Date: October 31, 1988
On Halloween, MacGyver and his friend Penny Parker travel to the small town of Cloverton, where Penny has inherited the estate of her Aunt Betty, who disappeared thirty years ago to the day. Stopping to pick up the keys, Sylvia Lang tells Mac and Penny that Betty was crazy, but Sylvia denies the rumors that the Parker house is haunted. Penny is unconvinced and remains jumpy as she and Mac enter. In the closet, Penny finds Betty's journal, which provides evidence of her progressive madness. Outside, a shed is destroyed by lightning and Penny discovers a human skull. Sheriff Howels comes to investigate, but he doesn't think that the body is Betty. When Mac goes to town for tools for his own investigation, Penny is terrified when the house starts to shake. Later, Mac works to recreate the face on the skull. The rebuilt face proves that the skull was Aunt Betty - who looked exactly like Penny. Penny and Mac call in the Sheriff, but during his visit, Penny suddenly grows distracted. She goes upstairs and dances around in a daze, spilling her coffee. By the bedroom window, she finds a necklace. After hearing Penny scream, Mac hurries upstairs, but she's gone. He soon discovers a secret panel in the closet. He finds Penny regaining consciousness, but a huge man knocks Mac out. When Mac comes to, the large man returns; Mac is prepared to fight, but Penny stops him. She's made friends with the man, Virgil, and she explains that when Virgil saw her in town, he thought Betty had come home. Mac has some news of his own: the coffee Penny was drinking had been drugged. Looking around the room, Mac realizes that the old still where Betty's father made moonshine was what caused the noises Penny heard. He also finds lead patches on the pipes and understands that lead poisoning caused Betty's madness. The Sheriff arrives and says that Virgil killed Betty all those years ago, but Mac doesn't believe him. The message engraved on the necklace boasts the initials of Betty - and Sheriff Howels. Piecing together a few other clues, Penny realizes that Betty was pregnant. Mac deduces that such a scandal would have hurt the Sheriff in the elections, so he killed Betty. Sheriff Howels locks the others in with the still and turns up the boiler. Mac is able, with Virgil's help, to free them from the room. Outside, the Sheriff's truck won't start, and his seatbelt won't unlatch; he is killed when the wind brings the gazebo crashing down on him. Later, Penny muses that Aunt Betty can finally rest in peace.
MacGyver: You never know where life is gonna take you. This is especially true when you've got a friend like Penny Parker.
MacGyver: There was a long story behind the way Penny came into her inheritance, and she was in no hurry to shorten it. In high school geometry I learned the shortest distance between two points is a straight line, but when telling a story, Penny always takes the scenic route.
Penny: Anyway, he told me how Aunt Betty's estate goes to the nearest female relative on her twenty-fifth birthday. And today is my twenty-fifth birthday, and I'm the closest female relative and before I know it, I'm an heiress! Isn't that wild?
MacGyver: Penny, I'm sorry. The supernatural is just an easy way to explain what we can't understand.
"You folks sure take Halloween seriously around here." Mac, to Sylvia
Penny: Did you know my Aunt Betty?
Sylvia: Oh, everybody in town knew Crazy Betty.
Penny: "Crazy"? You mean like, fun-loving and carefree?
Sylvia: I mean crazy. Loopy as a loon.
MacGyver: They never found her, huh.
Sylvia: Not a trace. Even called in the FBI. After seven years, they declared her dead.
"Every child in these parts tells stories about the old Parker place being haunted. Of course, they outgrow it eventually." Sylvia, after Penny asks if she's heard any weird reports
"I have a right to be jumpy . . . I'm an heiress." Penny, after thinking she sees someone move in the upstairs window
MacGyver: See? Told ya. Nothing to be afraid of.
Penny: That's easy for you to say. I'm the one who found out I'm related to a gangster and a madwoman.
MacGyver: Well, you know, that doesn't surprise me.
Penny (a bit offended): What?
MacGyver (realizing what he just said): Uh, what I mean is . . . every family's got a black sheep in the pack.
Penny: There any black sheep in your family?
MacGyver: You're lookin' at him.
Penny: We could be the first people to set foot in here since she disappeared.
MacGyver: I don't think so. There's not enough dust. It's like somebody's been keeping it up.
"A Penny for Your Thoughts." Penny, reading the cover of Betty's journal
Penny: Chocolate mint and banana icing. You even remembered my favorite.
MacGyver: Yeah. Who could forget a combination like that?
Penny: I found it hidden in my Aunt Betty's music box. By the way, are you any good at fixing music boxes?
Sheriff: Growing up, used to hear stories about an old Indian burial ground around here. First time anybody's ever found part of it, though.
MacGyver: Well, I don't think the Indians had dentists. At least, none that used gold crowns.
Sheriff: You an archaeologist, Mr. MacGyver?
MacGyver: No, not professionally.
Penny: Would you like a cup of coffee, Sheriff?
Sheriff: Ah, thank you kindly. Doctor says it doesn't agree with me; it's too hard on my stomach.
Penny (about Mac): That's what he's always saying.
"The house is alive, I can feel it. It watches me, follows my every move. I'm doomed to wander here. Alone for all eternity. Alone with the monster." Penny, reading Betty's journal
Penny: MacGyver, you nearly scared me to death!
MacGyver: Well, we nearly went together.
Penny: Don't tell me that you didn't hear them.
MacGyver: Oh . . . it's probably the plumbing.
Penny: The plumbing does not bang on walls and drag things around and moan.
MacGyver: Whatever's going on around here has got nothing to do with ghosts, or goblins, or the supernatural. There is a purely logical explanation for everything.
Penny: Really. Well, that would sound a lot more reassuring if you weren't holding a human skull.
"Penny, say hello to your Aunt Betty." Mac, revealing that the rebuilt skeleton face looks like Penny
Sheriff: The last thing I need is a couple of amateurs getting in the way of police work.
Penny: MacGyver's not an amateur.
MacGyver: Well, actually I am . . .
"She's a Parker all right. Strung tighter than a fiddle string, all of 'em." Sheriff Howels, about Penny
MacGyver: It's like I told you: there is a sane, rational explanation for everything that happened here.
[Suddenly, the music box starts playing upstairs.]
Penny: Is that so?
Original Air Date: November 21, 1988
MacGyver returns home to Minnesota to keep a promise that he made with three friends in 1963. He finds one friend, Chuck, at the hunting store that he owns. Chuck doesn't want to go dig up the time capsule they buried, but he says that he'll go if Mac can convince Neil. Mac visits the police station where he finds Neil, now a policeman, in the property room, looking at an old gun. Flashbacks reveal that Mac and his friends pooled their money to buy bullets for a gun despite protests from their friend Jesse. In the present, Neil's son, Shawn, is hooked on crack, and he is pursued by a group of drug-dealing thugs who want money. Chuck's son, Danny, saves Shawn from the thugs but breaks the windshield of one's car. Spider, the head baddie, vows revenge. After the gang shoots up Chuck's store, Shawn urges Danny to hide out in their cabin while Shawn tips the police about Spider's upcoming drug shipment. Danny agrees, and he plans to meet Shawn to get the cabin keys. However, Mac sees Danny swiping a gun from the shop; Danny admits that Shawn is in trouble, but he says he'll handle it. Danny turns a shelf over on Mac and escapes with the gun. Mac tells his friends what he's just learned. Spider abducts Shawn at gunpoint, wanting to know where Danny is. Spider and Watts, one of his gang, go after Danny who flees into an abandoned hospital. Mac finds the stoned Shawn, who explains that Spider made him do crack. Mac sends Shawn to get his father and Chuck, and Mac goes to help Danny. Seeing a car with a California plate, Mac realizes that the gang is there, too. Inside the hospital, the sound of gunshots leads Mac upstairs. Running from Spider and Watts, Danny slips on bullets that he dropped earlier. As he falls downstairs, the pistol fires and he is shot. Mac remembers how, twenty-five years before, Jesse was accidentally shot. Neil and Chuck were afraid, so they left as the young Mac tried to get help for Jesse. In the present, Mac stashes Danny in a room. He locks Watts up, but Spider finds Mac. They enter the room, but Danny isn't where Mac left him. Spider is distracted when Danny, weak from loss of blood, falls from his hiding place, and Mac knocks Spider out. Mac rolls Danny outside on an old stretcher as Chuck, Neil, and Shawn arrive with an ambulance. In the past, the paramedics aren't able to save Jesse. In the present, Danny will survive. Later, Mac, Neil and Chuck dig up their time capsule and remember their fallen friend.
"As a blood brother, I promise that, no matter what, I will meet here in exactly twenty-five years from today at high noon to dig up this time capsule." The promise Mac and his friends made in 1963
MacGyver: My hometown had grown up a whole lot in the years since I'd been back. But comin' home was still like reachin' into a grab-bag full of memories, some of them good, some of them not so good.
MacGyver: The decisions we make shape our lives. When I was a kid, I made a bad decision about a gun, and my life was never the same.
"You certainly look . . . healthy." Mac, to his not-small friend
Chuck: You still want to go through with this, MacGyver?
MacGyver: We made a promise.
Chuck: Nobody keeps kid promises, not twenty-five years later.
Chuck: Don't start, MacGyver. Everybody has a right to defend themselves. If he doesn't buy it from me, he'll just buy it someplace else.
MacGyver: Well, now that's original; did you come up with that yourself?
Danny: I still remember that homemade volcano you showed me how to make.
MacGyver: Oh, yeah. Did you get it to work?
Chuck: We had to repaint the kitchen.
"You know, there used to be a kid around here who could fix just about anything like that. Used one of those pocket-knives, too. Rigged up the darndest thing you ever saw to mow our lawn once." Sergeant Olsen, talking to Mac about Mac
MacGyver: This is the city. Mission City, Minnesota.
Neil: My name is Ryder. I'm a cop. I carry a badge.
MacGyver: My name's MacGyver. I'm his partner. I carry everything else.
MacGyver: Dragnet. The show that made you what you are today, huh, Neil?
Neil: Nah. I couldn't get in the Army.
Danny: I might need it to scare 'em off.
MacGyver: It never stops there, Danny! You got a gun; things happen. People die!
Shawn: Danny is my best friend.
MacGyver: I don't think you have friends anymore. You have sources!
Young Chuck: Where'd you learn how to shoot like that?
Young Mac: My dad taught me.
"The best pals a guy ever had." The description written on Jesse's picture in the time capsule
Original Air Date: November 28, 1988
As MacGyver is driving through the Pennsylvania countryside, a tire blows, and he is forced to jump out as his Jeep runs off the road. Two children, Jacob and Christy, witness the crash; Mac loses consciousness as Jacob sends Christy home and goes for help. MacGyver wakes in a bed and finds Jacob and his Amish family caring for him. Not much later, the sound of construction equipment is heard outside. Stevens, the foreman for the crew, angrily tells Jacob's grandfather, John Miller, that they don't live there anymore. Stevens enters the gate, still yelling and trying to start fights. Christy's dad, Mr. Wrightman, arrives and tells Stevens to calm down. Wrightman then reminds the Millers that the Government took their land through eminent domain to build a highway because the alternate route would be too expensive. Wrightman points out that the project will bring jobs that the area desperately needs. The Millers make it clear that they won't leave; left with no choice, Wrightman says that if they're still there in two days, he will return with the authorities. Later, Mac asks Elizabeth, Jacob's mother, why they haven't fought for their land. Elizabeth replies that John will not accept help. The men from the farm use a huge horse to retrieve Mac's wrecked Jeep, and he works to fix it. When Wrightman and his men arrive with the state troopers, the Millers - and Mac - line up, resolved to stay. The trooper tells Wrightman that they can't take all of them without calling for the county jail bus. Hoping to send a message, the workers start to clear the area around the old well. As a bulldozer rolls over the fence, Christy emerges from her hiding place, trying to stop it and save Jacob's home. However, as she backs up, the soft ground gives way and she slips into the well, getting caught with her arms pinned. The Amish and the construction team work together to tunnel over and rescue her. Later, Christy's dad visits the farm, saying that he'll ask the commission to reconsider the alternate route. John Miller says that he will go with him.
MacGyver: There's just something about the Pennsylvania countryside. It smells clean and innocent. And after four weeks crammed inside a stuffy space simulator testing lab, my senses needed to get reacquainted with nature.
Elizabeth: Do you remember what happened?
MacGyver: My Jeep went over a cliff . . . I died . . . and went to Thanksgiving?
Elizabeth: You ... you did go over a cliff, but you did not die. Our clothing is Amish.
MacGyver: Ah. That's a relief.
"My name's MacGyver. I think." Mac, poking fun at his head injury
Stevens: It's taken two years to get this highway project off the ground. Two years! While the politicians jerk around, and we've gotta feed our kids on nothing but hot air and promises.
Stevens: Now they got a cripple to fight their battles for 'em.
MacGyver: Yeah, well, if you'd go after a little boy with an ax, then I'm probably just about your speed.
"You are a poor patient, Mr. MacGyver." Elizabeth, while bandaging Mac's head
MacGyver: Why didn't your father go to court to get this highway thing stopped?
Elizabeth: John is my father-in-law, and he is old order. He will not accept help from the English.
Elizabeth: God gave us this land, and only He can make us leave.
MacGyver: What's the matter?
Elizabeth: Nothing. It is breakfast time.
MacGyver: It's the middle of the night.
Elizabeth: This is a farm. We start early.
MacGyver: What do you feed him? Miracle Grow?
[No reaction from the others.]
MacGyver: That's a joke.
Elizabeth (politely): Ah.
MacGyver: Um . . . never mind.
Elizabeth: He is hard on the outside, but he has a good heart.
MacGyver: He kind of reminds me of Mr. Simpson. . . . Ah, it's a teacher I had in third grade. Kept makin' me stand in the corner.
Elizabeth: And did you deserve this?
MacGyver: Most of the time . . .
Elizabeth: Will is being punished. No one may speak to him or communicate with him in any way.
Elizabeth: He will be one of us again . . . some day.
MacGyver: How long does that take?
Elizabeth: A year. Perhaps two.
MacGyver: That's an awful long time to be alone. Must be kinda tough on his family.
Elizabeth: It is. William is my brother.
"It's a joke . . . a very small, bad joke." Mac, after his humor is again lost on the Amish
Stevens: You got no proof we had anything to do with it. Half the town wants those Amish out of there.
MacGyver: Yeah, well, half the town doesn't have access to dynamite.
Wrightman: What do you know about this?
Stevens: What? You gonna listen to him?!
Wrightman: You and me are the only ones with a key to that shack.
Wrightman: This doesn't change anything. We'll still be out there in a couple of hours.
MacGyver: So will I.
Wrightman: You ever done anything like this before?
MacGyver: You want the truth?
Christy: Are you scared?
Christy: So am I.
On a Wing and a Prayer
Original Air Date: December 5, 1988
In the Central American country of Barraca, Pete Thornton and a nun named Sister Clara are taken prisoner after the sister tries to help a mortally wounded man branded as a traitor to the revolution. Having received word of the capture, MacGyver seeks help from his pilot friend, Jack Dalton. Jack acquires a rocket launcher, and he and Mac plan to approach the rebels posing as weapons dealers. Elsewhere, Raphael, the rebel leader arrives at the camp, and the woman in charge, Santina, informs him of Enrique's betrayal and death. Trying to learn what the captives know, Raphael shoots Pete; Sister Clara confesses that Enrique told her about the bomb planted in the presidential palace, but she insists they were captured before they could tell anyone. The interrogation is interrupted by Jack's plane landing, and the prisoners are returned to a tent. Santina is impressed by the rocket launcher. Jack goes to have a drink with Raphael, while Mac sneaks in to see Pete and Sister Clara. Mac creates a diversion, and Jack joins them as they head for the plane. However, the plane is hit by gunfire during takeoff, and Jack is forced to land. Unable to radio past the mountains to warn about the bomb, Jack and Mac work to repair the plane. As Santina and her men travel to where the plane went down, she grows suspicious that Raphael's intentions are not solely for the good of the people. With Pete's health failing from the loss of blood, Mac and Jack start to attempt a highly-unusual takeoff as Santina and her men come into view. Despite the setbacks, the plane takes off. Raphael is furious, but Santina has her men take him prisoner. Later, a fully-recovered Pete sits in his office and reports that the Barracan peace talks are going well, with Santina representing the revolution.
"Look, if it's about that C-note I owe you, I'm just waitin' around for payday . . ." Jack, noticing that Mac is about to ask him something
MacGyver: Listen . . . compadre . . . I need a favor.
Jack: A favor from who?
MacGyver: You . . . [obviously, he hates to ask] . . . I need a favor from you, Jack.
Jack: You do?
Jack: MacGyver needs a favor from moi?
MacGyver: Yes, Jack.
Jack: Well, name it! Whatever - anything! I've been waitin' years for this!
Santina: Enrique and I grew up in the same village. I thought we shared the same dreams for Barraca. How could he betray us?
Raphael: If I may borrow and old adage: these are times that try men's souls. Enrique's soul was weak.
[Mac dons a ponytail and glasses for a disguise.]
MacGyver: What do you think?
Jack: Be still my beatin' heart. The very picture of a sky pirate if I ever saw one.
Raphael: With all due respect to your religion, Sister, the eleventh commandment in this part of Barraca is "thou shall not harbor a traitor to the revolution."
MacGyver: Let's just no overdo it, alright? Low-key. Very low-key.
Jack: Hey, you know me, Mac. I can be a low-key kind of guy. You've seen me unconscious before, haven't you?
MacGyver: Keep in mind Pete and the sister are countin' on somebody, and it's us.
Jack: What sister? I didn't know Pete had a sister. Is she good-lookin'?
Jack: Oh. Like Pete, huh.
Jack: Mac, you didn't tell me it was Guns for Nuns!
MacGyver: You're overreacting.
Jack: Oh, yeah. What do you know? Those rebels are probably down there cleanin' blackboards even as we speak!
Santina: Who are you? What do you want?
Jack: Jack Dalton, Mercenary Management and Equipment. My associate, Mr. MacGyver.
MacGyver: You know, if you ordered fifty or more, we might be able to offer you a substantial discount. Say, uh, twenty percent?
Raphael: America. Land of free enterprise.
MacGyver: So how about if I take a look at your inventory? Maybe see what you're in the market for.
Santina: That is all this is to you, isn't it? A business.
MacGyver: Everybody's gotta make a livin', Captain.
Santina: By selling death at a discount.
MacGyver: Hey, we're not killing anybody--
Santina: No. But you bring guns to my country. Like the ones that butchered my mother and father.
Santina: When we win this revolution, we will have no further need of people like you. You are just one of many hard choices one is forced for make for freedom.
MacGyver: Yeah, well, I'd love to stand here and talk revolutionary political philosophy with you but, uh . . . it was a long flight. Got a place I could freshen up?
"Well, it's nice to see higher education at work." Jack, after Raphael says he majored in political science at Berkeley
Jack: Look at this. I'm the proud owner of an open can of sardines with wings on it. No, I do not have insurance for rebel gunfire . . .
"It's going to take a lot more than a wing and a prayer to get airborne." Jack, looking at the damage to the plane
Sister Clara: Enrique saw Raphael for what he really stands for. All he's interested in is the power and what it can get him.
Santina: Even if the gringos escape, why should this affect the progress of our revolution?
Raphael: My plans hinge on that bomb going off.
Santina: If it doesn't, it is just one more setback. We will continue to fight, as we have in the past.
Raphael: I want what Monteyo's death can give me now!
Santina: Give you?!
Raphael: The people, of course.
"You are amazing, Mr. MacGyver. Making something out of nothing like a miracle worker." Sister Clara, as Mac is working on a patch for the plane
MacGyver: Listen, Jack. I'm sorry I got you into this.
Jack: Not half as sorry as you'd be if you left those two behind.
MacGyver: We're doing great, Pete. We'll have you out of here in no time.
Pete: You never were a good liar.
"Not everyone is lucky enough to have a friend like you. I feel honored. I mean that." Pete, to Mac
MacGyver (on the radio): You can't guarantee anything, not even what you're fighting for. Not as along as you're taking orders from Raphael.
Santina: I did not ask you for a sermon; I asked you for your surrender.
"Your slipknot's not slipping!" Mac, to Jack
Pete: Where's MacGyver?
Jack: He's . . . flying economy, Pete.