MacGyver » Season 1
Original Air Date: January 29, 1986
MacGyver receives a call from Amy Austin, an old flame. She says that she's in trouble, and Mac says that he'll fly out there. They plan to meet at "their" beach. The next day, Mac remembers the last time he was there; he had signed them up to work on a ship and see the world, but Amy chose to stay and get a job at the nuclear processing plant. A car pulls up, and Mac waves - right before the car explodes! Checking the car's remains, Mac finds a bullet-sized hole in a piece of the gas tank, and he points it out to the investigator, Chief Trane. Another friend from Mac's college days, Tim Wexler arrives; he works at the nuclear plant also, and the police had called about Amy. The next day, Mac attends Amy's funeral. However, as he gets in his car to leave, Amy is hiding in the back seat. Crying and scared, she tells him to drive. She says that she was afraid, so she had sent her roommate Bonnie to get him. Amy explains that she is director of research at the plant, and she recently discovered that enough uranium is missing to make a nuclear bomb. She had shared her findings with her boss, but he was killed in a car crash on his way to report the theft. Mac theorizes that the missing uranium is still at the plant, since someone is trying to eliminate those who know about it. They go to the plant to retrieve the evidence that Amy hid in a disposal chamber. Wearing protective suits, they check the supply area and find the missing uranium hidden in the concrete base of a sign. When they return to the decon area, Tim is there with a gun. He says that he's in too deep to get out, but Mac doesn't believe that Tim is willing to commit murder. Mac and Amy go to the control room, but Trane is there. He's about to shoot them, when Tim rushes to try to stop him. Tim is shot, and Trane shoots the control panel before running out of bullets. He rushes out of the room, but an alarm starts to sound: with the controls ruined, the system starts to overload, heading for a meltdown. Mac decides to try to open the release valve manually, but on the way, he runs into Trane, who has acquired the gun that Tim had. Mac hides and gets the jump on Trane, who accidentally fires a hole into a pipe. He's doused with a shot of radioactive steam as Mac hurriedly puts on his protective helmet. Amy arrives and they rush Trane to the showers to be decontaminated. They continue on to the release valve, but Mac accidentally drops the wrench he needs to open it. However, Amy had picked up Trane's gun; Mac removes the piece that holds the bullets and the resulting hole enables him to grip the valve. It opens, and meltdown is averted.
"I'm part Canadian, eh?" MacGyver, trying to intimidate his table hockey opponent
"Are you gonna play fair, or do I spread the word about how totally dishonest you are?" Susan, after Mac beats her at table hockey
MacGyver: Fourth time, eh?
Susan: Yeah, I like that accent.
MacGyver: What accent, eh?
"Hello, this is not MacGyver , so obviously you've reached a wrong number. But if you need to leave a message . . . " The first part of Mac's answering machine message
MacGyver: The past is a strange country. You go back; it doesn't recognize you. I've changed in ways I didn't know. And if I was a stranger, so was Amy.
MacGyver: I took physics because it was interesting, and it excited me - not to buy myself a job.
MacGyver: Amy, come on. There's a world out there: let's go look at it! Be something different.
Amy: I don't want to be different. I want a life I can count on.
Amy: You always carried a pocketful of junk.
Amy: And you always fixed everything . . .
"It's all downhill from here." Mac, uttering one of those lines you should never say because you will inevitably be proven wrong
Amy: I think we oughta just run you for President or something.
MacGyver: Um, no thanks. I'd rather have this problem than his.
Amy: This film badge reacts to radiation. If you're near anything hot, it starts to turn black.
MacGyver: When it's all black, they give you a new one?
Amy: When it's all black, they give you a coffin.
Amy: Just how well do you read people?
MacGyver: I'm taking the final exam right now.
MacGyver: So, if I can open it manually, we're home free, right?
Amy: Mac, no - it'll kill you!
MacGyver: No way . . . I haven't paid my taxes yet.
MacGyver: A marine sergeant once started a charge by yelling at his men, "Come on, you wanna live forever?" Now, I use to think that was about the guttiest thing ever said. But of course, the older you get, the more nervous you get.
Trane: You can't run forever, MacGyver.
MacGyver: Trane, are you crazy? We've got a runaway reactor to worry about here!
Trane: That's what I'm trying to help you with: stop all that worryin'!
"I hate heights, and I despise guns. So how the hell did I get myself up here?" Mac, assessing his situation
Amy: You know, sometimes I wish we could find our way back to that crossroad, Mac.
MacGyver: Yeah? What do you think we'd find?
Amy: Just what we have. Our friendship.
Original Air Date: February 5, 1986
Someone phones the captain of a cruise ship to report a bomb; when the captain goes to investigate, the bomb explodes. At his apartment in Venice Beach, MacGyver receives a call from Pete Thornton, asking for help; Pete explains that the bomb was just a warning, and the bomber is threatening to detonate another. Pete says there's a briefing at his office - and there's a surprise for Mac. Mac discovers that the surprise is his friend Charlie Robinson, with whom Mac worked in Vietnam as part of a bomb defusing team. Upon learning that Charlie's wife is pregnant, Mac tries to send Charlie home, but Charlie refuses to go. They find Pete in a room with his team monitoring the situation, and he introduces them to another bomb specialist, Mike Donahue. Pete says that the ship is heading toward a bad storm, so unloading the 1100 passengers into lifeboats isn't an option. Viking, the bomber, calls demanding $6 million. Mac and Charlie are lowered onto the ship from a helicopter, but a faulty winch drops their bag of tools into the ocean. On board, the acting captain introduces herself as Carol Tanner. She shows them to the bomb, which is disguised as an electrical panel in the engine room. Looking through the glass cover, they see a complicated series of triggers, including a dish containing a powdery substance. Another ship employee arrives, announcing that another bomb has been found. Since they need to defuse the bombs at the same time, Charlie goes to work on the other one. Communicating with each other and with Pete's office in LA via headsets, Charlie insists on going first. He penetrates a seal around the glass with a thin piece of wire, trying to get a sample of the powdery substance. Unfortunately, the seal is pierced and as air rushes in, Charlie shouts that it's a vacuum - then the bomb explodes. Mac realizes that the powdery substance is phosphorus: it flashes when air hits it and triggers the explosion. Another bomb is found on the ship. With time running out, Pete tells Mac that he's going ahead with the money drop. The agents leave the ransom in a locker at a bus terminal and wait for the bomber. Viking retrieves the money from a false panel behind the locker and calls to report that since they were trying to catch him, he's not going to tell them how to disarm the bombs. Captain Carol goes to work on the other bomb, which is identical to the first; she follows Mac's lead, and they are able to contain the phosphorus, remove the glass cover, and stop a second trigger. After that, the bombs seem to be deactivated. Recalling parts from various bombs in Vietnam, Mac begins to suspect Donahue; his suspicions are confirmed when Pete finds that Donahue is the common link between those cases from the past. Suddenly the bombs spring back to life, and Mac removes the lower panel to find a counter ticking down from one minute. There are two switches, one yellow and one blue. Mac puts Donahue on the spot, asking him which one he should pull, since one will stop the bomb, and the other will set it off. Donahue, who is unaware of Mac's suspicions of him, says the blue one. Carol reaches for the blue one, but Mac tells her to stop. He thanks Donahue and says that he'll pull the yellow. He does, and the bomb is shut down. Carol follows suit as Pete's men arrest Donahue. Later, a helicopter is on the way to take Mac home, but Carol invites him to stay, saying that a cruise is a great place to relax.
MacGyver: Sure is great to start off a sunny day thinking about the people you like most. My pal Susan, for instance. She's my landlady, the building maintenance person - and the only human being who's figured out how to keep me organized. So, how do I repay her? A twenty-first century breakfast, of course. I wonder how she likes her eggs . . .
MacGyver: Okay, Susan, this is the future. Or, part of it anyway.
Susan: I think I'll hang loose over here in the past. Might be safer.
[Mac operates a little robot.]
MacGyver: Now we put Roberta to work. Isn't she great?
Susan: Let's not go straight to "great." After all, I did just meet her.
"Love that modern technology." Susan, after Roberta drops an egg on her shoe
[Mac answers the phone.]
MacGyver: Whoever you are, I owe an incredible debt of--
Pete: Good, I'll take it. Right now.
MacGyver: Peter. On second thought . . .
Pete: Mac, I need your help.
MacGyver: Last time you said that to me, I ended up in Washington, wearing a pin-striped suit and a necktie.
MacGyver: I had this contract with Pete Thornton's outfit that says I take only those jobs I wanna take. Now, you'd think I'd say "no" once in a while. Especially when Pete wants to put me in the middle of the ocean to babysit a bomb.
MacGyver: This isn't you and me in 'Nam. And there wasn't a Shirley or a little one on the way then either.
Charlie: Yeah, I know, I know. And there wasn't a supply company and a home mortgage looking bankruptcy square in the face.
"Ignore him. He has this irrepressible paternal instinct toward me." Charlie, to Pete, about Mac
Charlie: You're a wonder, a true wonder.
MacGyver: Just survival, Charlie.
MacGyver: Pick a number between one and ten, quick!
MacGyver: Close, but wrong; I go first.
Carol: Tell me, Mr. MacGyver. Would you want to know that a very good possibility exists that you could die a violent death some time during the next three hours?
MacGyver: Yes, Ma'am, I would.
Carol: How can I help?
MacGyver: Just hold a steady course, and think positive thoughts.
"Listen closely. You must realize that you do not have either the time or intelligence to stop my bombs . . . " Part of the bomber's message
Charlie: Pick a number, Mac.
MacGyver: Oh, no . . . We played that game already.
Charlie: I guess that means it's my turn to go first.
MacGyver: Remember the routine in 'Nam: by the numbers. Slow and easy. And we'll live forever.
MacGyver: You got any neon signs on board?
Atkins: The search party found another one. In the auxiliary power room.
MacGyver: You got two neon signs?
MacGyver: It's not technology, it's . . . art.
Pete: "Art"?! MacGyver, it's a damn bomb!
MacGyver: You just lack artistic tastes.
The Enemy Within
Original Air Date: February 12, 1986
In East Germany, as MacGyver runs from soldiers, Craig Bannister, a fellow agent, arrives. After Mac does a quick repair on the brake line, they cross the border to safety. Back in LA, Mac congratulates Pete Thornton on his new job as executive director of operations; Pete asks for Mac's help with a situation, but Mac declines, saying that he's moving. Later, Pete arrives at Mac's place while he's packing. Pete explains that there is a security leak in the department and they've recently lost four of their top agents. Pete is setting a trap to catch the mole, using a Russian defector named Victoria Tomanova as bait. Mac again declines. However, Mac agrees to attend a Peace Through Science symposium. Pete arrives with Victoria; she tells Pete and Mac that she recognizes one man, Lem, as a GRU assassin. She insists that he doesn't know her, so she is safe. A speaker, Reverend Mather, steps to the podium. Lem presses a device and the reverend seems to grow distracted. Suddenly he pulls out a gun and starts shooting. Mac and Bannister subdue him. Lem, still unnoticed, presses the button on his device again, and Reverend Mather clutches his chest. He dies soon after of an apparent heart attack. Later, Mac finds evidence that the heart attack was induced. Meanwhile, Ingrid causes Bannister to fall into a trance-like state. He tells her about Mac's hunt for the mole. Ingrid says that Mac and Victoria are responsible for what happened, and Bannister must kill them. Mac and Victoria return to the ball room, where Mac tries to help jog Victoria's memory. Watching a tape, Victoria thinks back and recalls seeing Ingrid before - as an officer in the Red Army. Suddenly Lem and Ingrid arrive with Bannister, who is pointing a gun at Mac and Victoria. Ingrid confesses that Bannister is the mole, but he doesn't know it. She orders Bannister to shoot, but Mac shoves the TV cart at them. He punches Lem, and Victoria tackles Ingrid. Recalling memories of their adventures, Mac gets Bannister to see the truth. Ingrid induces a heart attack in Bannister, but Mac rigs up a piece of medical equipment and shocks Bannister back to life.
MacGyver: When you think about it, I take on a lot of jobs nobody else'd want. The question is, why do I want 'em? I find myself asking these questions more and more, and rationalizing answers with stuff like flexible hours, nice scenery, all expense paid vacations in colorful eastern European luxury resorts. But the bottom line is, I like it. I actually like getting into stuff that makes the old adrenalin pump. And I get to meet some . . . interesting people who've made some interesting career choices themselves.
"Yeah, we're going to the border alright - in pieces." Bannister, upon discovering that the brakes have failed
"Ever think about making a living as a hood ornament?" Bannister to Mac, after Mac's during-the-chase auto repair job
[Bannister introduces the woman he was just kissing.]
Bannister: This is Ingrid.
MacGyver: Well I certainly hope so.
Pete: I thought we could rely on each other; I thought we were friends.
MacGyver: We are friends, Pete. Were friends, shall be ever more - after my vacation!
Pete: I need someone I can trust to stay on top of it.
MacGyver: You have got a whole file full of people on salary who can do that.
Pete: Yes, and any one of them could turn out to be the mole!
"This is useless, to talk to this bolvin. Let us go." Victoria to Pete after Mac doesn't want to help
"John Wayne would not have been afraid." Victoria, trying to give Mac some perspective
[Bannister feigns being shocked at Mac wearing a tuxedo.]
Ingrid: Will either of you please tell me what is so amazing?
Bannister: MacGyver. I mean, this man's idea of black tie is a dirty shoelace. Definitely not into formality.
Ingrid: Then the answer is simple: a woman.
MacGyver: No, the answer is Pete put the arm on me.
Victoria: Did you finish packing, Mr. MacGyver?
MacGyver: Actually, it defeated me completely.
Victoria: You must learn not to be defeated so easily.
Victoria: GRU. Special Operations.
Pete: Which means?
Victoria: He kills people.
"Please keep your hands from me." Victoria, when Mac tries to usher her to the door for her own safety
[Bannister and Mac are watching Ed perform an autopsy.]
Bannister: You have to make jokes?
Ed: What do you expect? Tap dance? [to Mac] Who's your sensitive flower?
MacGyver: Ed, you've been down here too long.
MacGyver: What is it?
Ed: I'll probably be able to tell you that tomorrow - unless you're in a rush.
MacGyver: I'm in a rush.
Ed: You're always in a rush.
Bannister: Was he political?
Pete: Reverend Mather? As far as we can tell, the last political stand he took was against Pontius Pilate.
Victoria: You saved my life. The Chinese say if someone saves your life, you are in debt to them forever.
MacGyver: Strange folk, the Chinese. They also call their beautiful children ugly for fear the gods will punish them for the sin of pride.
MacGyver: What I'm going to do here is activate a magnetic field and . . . turn the chemicals into nylon. Good for ladies' stockings, and, uh . . . clogging the arteries of a kind old man.
Victoria: I said before I'm not afraid. I lied.
"You know Mac. He can't let a puzzle alone." Bannister, to Ingrid
"John Wayne could not have done it better." Victoria, after Mac saves Bannister
Every Time She Smiles
Original Air Date: February 19, 1986
In Bulgaria, MacGyver meets a contact in a park, and over a game of chess, the contact gives MacGyver microfilm. Later, as Mac stands in line at the airport, a chatty American woman named Penny Parker strikes up a conversation. She mentions breaking up with the man she was seeing, but she soon spots him entering the terminal with the authorities. She slips something into Mac's pocket as the man, Stephan, approaches her, wanting his jewelry back. When Mac tries to pass through the metal detector, the jewels set off the alarm. Stephan's men find the jewels. Since one piece is missing, they lock Penny and MacGyver in a small room, after they take Mac's things - including the postcard with the microfilm attached to it. Mac frees them from the room. Returning to the park, Mac asks the contact to hide Penny somewhere safe. Unfortunately, the three are discovered by Stephan and his men. Penny and Mac escape, but the contact is caught. General Petrovitch, Stephan's uncle and boss, tells Stephan that the jewels were stolen as part of the goods embezzled by some of the security officers. Stephan says that he is innocent, but the general replies that his name appears on one of the secret Swiss bank accounts. The microfilm contains documents stolen by those trying to expose them. Elsewhere, Mac breaks into Stephan's apartment to look for the postcard. Penny soon joins him; the doorman let her in. Stephan returns home. Mac hides in the kitchen and works to create a diversion as Penny talks to Stephan. Mac's plan works, and he and Penny drive away in Stephan's car. Almost out of gasoline, Penny remembers a place that might have some. However, Stephan also thought of the place. General Petrovitch arrives, wanting Stephan to kill Mac and Penny so that there are no witnesses. Stephan suddenly grabs his uncle's gun, and Mac punches the general out. The three take the general's car and flee to the Greek border. The border guard asks for their passports - which they don't have - but Penny solves the problem: she knows the guard.
MacGyver: The first time I got to ride on a merry-go-round, I was about six or seven. I'd never seen anything like it. There was a kind of magic. Go to a merry-go-round anywhere in the world and you can see the same look in the kids' eyes. It's magic. It's a shame we have to grow up - and lose it.
MacGyver: I learned something up in the Swiss Alps: I just shouldn't go skiing without a parachute. Kinda busted up my vacation. And my hand.
Penny: Oh, you don't know how good it is to see someone from back home. [She leans closer.] They're all foreigners here.
Penny: I'm Penny Parker. You can remember that 'cause it's got the same letter at the front of each name. That's important theatrically, you know.
MacGyver: Oh yeah?
Penny: Sure! Just think of it. Farrah Fawcett. Tina Turner. Marilyn Monroe?
MacGyver: Penny Parker?
Penny: Yeah! You catch on quick.
Penny: Penny Parker's not my real name, of course. I had it changed when I started modeling. Really hasn't hurt my dancing career either.
Stephan: You didn't even say goodbye.
Penny (sadly): Goodbye.
Stephan: Penny, I love you to distraction.
Penny: Oh, really. And just yesterday morning you were ready to kill me, just because I smiled at that nice young officer.
Stephan: Penny, when you smile at the man, it is already the beginning of the end. For the man, I mean.
Penny: Well, I'm certainly not going to give up smiling just so you won't get upset.
MacGyver: I know you're not going to believe this, but I haven't the slightest idea where those came from.
Stephan: You're right. I don't believe you.
Penny: I'm sorry.
MacGyver (half paying attention): Mm-hmm.
Penny: Are you mad at me?
MacGyver: Why would I be mad at you?
Penny: Well, you missed your plane.
Penny: And they took your luggage.
Penny: And they think you stole the jewels.
MacGyver: Yeah, that's right.
Penny: And they have your passport.
MacGyver (looks at her, starting to get annoyed): I almost forgot that one.
Penny: Well, see. Then you should be mad at me.
MacGyver: Alright, I'm mad at you.
Penny (pouting): You really didn't have to tell me that.
Penny: It's not worth all that much.
MacGyver: How do you know that?
Penny: Well, because a guy with some government job, who's got a shoebox for an apartment, wouldn't give me real jewelry unless it wasn't real, right?
MacGyver: If that's true, why is he still holding us now that he has it back?
MacGyver: Why my pocket?
Penny: Well, you were the closest one around . . .
MacGyver: Grab that chair.
Penny: Well, why don't I get two chairs, and then we can both sit?
MacGyver: It's not for sittin' . . . [he sighs] . . . Never mind the chair.
"Hey, that's good - cheap walls! We can just poke our way right out of here!" Penny, catching on to Mac's plan
MacGyver: You ever been to a rodeo?
Penny: Sort of. I was Queen of the Future Farmers once. We--
"It's just like the ride at Disneyland." Penny, on the luggage conveyor belt
"Economy class." MacGyver, explaining to those nearby why they were on the luggage conveyor belt
Stephan: 700,000 lev. I can see where that could be embarrassing.
General Petrovich: It could be fatal. For both of us.
Stephan: But I've done nothing. I'm innocent.
General Petrovich: Perhaps. But unfortunately, your name appears on one of those Swiss bank accounts. Number 1779, to be precise.
Penny: Are you really a spy?
MacGyver: I'm just . . . doing a favor for a friend.
Penny: I just have this bad habit of trusting people. And well, sometimes I think it's a mistake.
MacGyver: Penny . . . you say what you think, and you do what you say. That's not such a bad policy in my book.
Penny: Maybe . . . Sometimes you can get hurt.
MacGyver: Well, no one ever became a great woman living in a vacuum.
"So she has been using you, Stephan. She must be an American agent." General Petrovich, about Penny
MacGyver: Bouncin' around Bulgaria with Penny Parker reminded me of playing dominoes: with every move, something else might fall.
"I'll tell you what's simple. Me! For gettin' into that first conversation with Penny Parker . . . But what else could I do? I mean, a guy just can't be . . . rude." Mac, realizing why one should not talk to strangers
"I think my luck's startin' to change." Mac, about to be proven wrong
MacGyver: How did you get out of the place?
Penny: Well, I went to the ladies' room and climbed out the window.
MacGyver (after a pause): Of course you did. Why do I ask those questions?
MacGyver: Let's get out of here before your friend comes home.
Penny: Oh, he never gets home 'til real late.
[There's a noise at the door.]
Penny: . . . Usually.
Stephan: Oh, Penny. How did we get ourselves into all this?
MacGyver (hiding in the kitchen): My sentiments exactly.
Stephan: So, I do want the ring back, and I also want your accomplice, Mr. MacGyver.
Penny: He's not my accomplice!
Stephan: There's no use to lie, Penny. I know about him. You used me. The two of you were working together as spies.
Penny: I'm not a spy! We met for the first time at the airport. I was just standing in line--
Stephan: If that is true, he has nothing to fear from us, and neither do you. You can speak out freely. Where is he?
MacGyver (appears at the kitchen door): Right here.
Stephan: May I take this as a surrender?
MacGyver: Uhh . . . not just yet.
[Stephan pulls a gun.]
Stephan: I'm not a man who likes violence, Mr. MacGyver.
MacGyver: That's great. Neither do I!
Stephan: Move away, Penny.
Penny: What are you gonna do?
MacGyver: Well, the cliche thing to be done here is for him to blow my kneecaps off.
Stephan: If necessary.
Penny: Are you both crazy?!
[Stephan hurries to investigate the smoky kitchen.]
Stephan: What have you done?
MacGyver (goes to punch Stephan): Burnt the roast . . .
Military Guy: There is no way they can get through now, Sir.
Stephan: There is always a way. We just have to make certain they won't find it.
Penny: You know, I really like you. You understand me. We're on the same wavelength.
MacGyver: Well, that worries me.
"Everyone forgets something . . . once in a while." Mac, to Penny
Penny: Don't tractors run on gas?
MacGyver (with a sigh): They've been known to.
Penny: You're not gonna shoot us are you?
Stephan: Shoot you? Why? For stealing my car? Destroying my career? Collaborating with a spy? Stealing state secrets?
MacGyver: Oh, come on, Stephan. You and I both know this has nothing to do with state secrets.
Stephan: I have no choice.
MacGyver: I don't think that's quite true. It's a matter of conscience, Steve. You do have one of those, don't you?
Penny (angry): I thought he did. Once.
Stephan: Are you crazy?
MacGyver: It's been rumored.
[After Penny recognizes the Greek border guard.]
Stephan: Every time she smiles.
MacGyver: We shoulda known.