[ helpful hints and lessons learned ] @ www.rusted-crush.com

"Help Desk"

As I've heard it said, "The only thing more painful than learning from experience is *not* learning from experience."

I've learned that ...

... either you control your attitude, or it controls you.
... good friends are family members that we are allowed to choose.
... heroes are the people who do what has to be done when it needs to be done, regardless of the consequences.
... if you give someone $20 and never see them again, it was probably worth it.
... it isn't enough to be forgiven by someone else. Sometimes you have to learn to forgive yourself.
... it takes a long time to become the person I want to be.
... it takes years to build up trust, and only seconds to destroy it.
... it's a lot easier to react than it is to think.
... it's not WHAT you have in your life, but WHO you have in your life.
... maturity has more to do with what types of experiences you've had and what you've learned from them, and less to do with how many birthdays you've celebrated.
... money is a lousy way of keeping score.
... no matter how badly your heart is broken, the world doesn't stop for your grief.
... no matter how good a person is, they're going to hurt you every once in a while, and you must forgive them for that.
... no matter how much I care, some people just don't care back.
... no matter how thinly you slice it, there are always two sides.
... our background and circumstances may have influenced who we are, but we are responsible for ourselves.
... patience takes a whole lot of practice.
... sometimes the people you expect to kick you when you're down will be the ones to help you get back up.
... talking can ease emotional pains.
... the happiest of people don't necessarily have the best of everything, they just make the most of everything that comes along their way.
... there are people who love you dearly, but just don't know how to show it.
... there is more of my parents in me than I thought.
... to have character is to be big enough to take life on.
... true friendship continues to grow, even over the longest distance.
... you can do something in an instant that will give you a heartache for life.
... you should always leave loved ones with loving words. It may be the last time you see them.
... we don't have to change friends if we understand that friends change.
... when I'm angry I have the right to be angry, but that doesn't give me the right to be cruel.
... you can keep going long after you think you cannot.
... you should never tell a child their dreams are unlikely or outlandish. Few things are more humiliating, and what a tragedy it would be if they believed it.
... you shouldn't compare yourself to the best others can do, but to the best you can do.

Life's Little Instructions

by H. Jackson Brown Jr.

Sing in the shower.
Treat everyone you meet like you want to be treated.
Watch a sunrise at least once a year.
Leave the toilet seat in the down position.
Never refuse homemade brownies.
Strive for excellence, not perfection.
Plant a tree on your birthday.
Learn 3 clean jokes.
Return borrowed vehicles with the gas tank full.
Compliment 3 people every day.
Never waste an opportunity to tell someone you love them.
Leave everything a little better than you found it.
Keep it simple.
Think big thoughts but relish small pleasures.
Become the most positive and enthusiastic person you know.
Floss your teeth.
Ask for a raise when you think you've earned it.
Overtip breakfast waitresses.
Be forgiving of yourself and others.
Say, "Thank you" a lot.
Say, "Please" a lot.
Avoid negative people.
Buy whatever kids are selling on card tables in their front yards.
Wear polished shoes.
Remember other people's birthdays.
Commit yourself to constant improvement.
Carry jumper cables in your truck.
Have a firm handshake.
Send lots of Valentine cards.
Sign them, "Someone who thinks you're terrific."
Look people in the eye.
Be the first to say hello.
Use the good silver.
Return all things you borrow.
Make new friends, but cherish the old ones.
Keep a few secrets.
Sing in a choir.
Plant flowers every spring.
Have a dog.
Always accept an outstretched hand.
Stop blaming others.
Take responsibility for every area of your life.
Wave at kids on school busses.
Be there when people need you.
Feed a stranger's expired parking meter.
Don't expect life to be fair.
Never underestimate the power of love.
Drink champagne for no reason at all.
Live your life as an exclamation, not an explanation.
Don't be afraid to say, "I made a mistake."
Don't be afraid to say, "I don't know."
Compliment even small improvements.
Keep your promises no matter what.
Marry for love.
Rekindle old friendships.
Count your blessings.
Call your mother.

More Instructions for Life

A friend listens to our words but hears our heart.
A happy heart is better than a full purse.
A loving atmosphere in your home is so important. Do all you can to create a tranquil harmonious home.
Always put yourself in others' shoes. If you feel that it hurts you, it probably hurts the other person, too.
Approach love and cooking with reckless abandon!
Be cheerful. The problems that worry us most are those that never arrive.
Be engaged at least six months before you get married.
Be gentle with the earth.
Be not simply good, but good for something!
Believe in love at first sight.
Cherish yesterday, dream tomorrow, LIVE today!
Commit random acts of senseless kindness.
Don't believe all you hear, spend all you have, or loaf all you want.
Don't cry because it is over, smile because it happened.
Don't judge people by their relatives, their job, their age, or the life they were born into.
Don't just listen to what someone is saying. Listen to why they are saying it.
Don't let a little dispute injure a great friendship.
Don't trust someone who doesn't close their eyes when you kiss them.
Don't use time or words carelessly. Neither can be retrieved.
Dream what you want to dream; go where you want to go; be what you want to be, because you have only one life and one chance to do all the things you want to do.
Every flower must grown through dirt.
Follow the three R's: Respect for self, Respect for others, and Responsibility for all your actions.
Forget the troubles that passed away. Remember the blessings that come each day.
Give people more than they expect and do it cheerfully.
Goodness is the only investment that never fails.
Happiness is not having what you want, but wanting what you have.
Happiness is not pleasure, it is victory!
Happiness lies for those who cry, those who hurt, those who have searched, and those who have tried, for only they can appreciate the importance of people who have touched their lives.
If teenagers want to be so different, why do they dress alike?
If you don't have time to do it right, when will you have time to do it over?
If you make a lot of money, put it to use helping others while you are living. That is wealth's greatest satisfaction.
If you want the rainbow, you have to put up with the rain.
In disagreements, fight fairly. No name calling. Deal only with the current situation: don't bring up the past. Don't accuse: state why you are upset.
It is always better to fail in doing something than to excel in doing nothing.
It's true that we don't know what we've got until we lose it, but it's also true that we don't know what we've been missing until it arrives.
Judge your success by what you had to give up in order to get it.
Kind words do not cost much, yet they accomplish much.
Learn the rules, then break some.
Learn to listen. Opportunity sometimes knocks very softly.
Listen like your life depends on hearing.
Live a good and honorable life. Then when you get older and think back, you'll get to enjoy it a second time.
Live every day of your life as though you expect to live forever!
Love deeply and passionately. You might get hurt but it's the only way to live life completely.
May you have enough happiness to make you sweet, enough trials to make you strong, enough sorrow to keep you human, enough hope to make you happy.
Memorize your favorite poem.
Mind your own business.
Motivation is what gets you started. Habit is what keeps you going.
Never cut what can be untied.
Never give up on anybody. Miracles happen every day.
Never interrupt when you are being flattered.
Never laugh at anyone's dreams. People who don't have dreams don't have much.
Not everything that can be counted counts. Not everything that counts can be counted.
Of all the things you wear, your expression is the most important.
Old age is when you know all the answers but nobody asks you the questions.
Once a year, go someplace you've never been before.
Open your arms to change, but don't let go of your values.
People may doubt what you say, but they will always believe what you do.
Plant a dream, and watch it grow!
Pray. There's immeasurable power in it.
Read between the lines.
Read more books. Television is no substitute.
Read like you can't get enough learning.
Real friends believe in your dreams as much as you do.
Remember that great love and great achievements involve great risk.
Remember that not getting what you want is sometimes a wonderful stroke of luck.
Remember that silence is sometimes the best answer.
Remember that the best relationship is one where your love for each other is greater than your need for each other.
Remember that your character is your destiny.
Say "bless you" when you hear someone sneeze.
Share your knowledge. It's a way to achieve immortality.
Share your smile with everyone, but save your kiss for only one.
Silent and listen are spelled with the same letters.
Smile when picking up the phone. The caller will hear it in your voice.
Smile a lot. It costs nothing and is beyond price.
Spend some time alone.
The best kind of friend is the kind you can sit on a porch and swing with, never say a word, and then walk away feeling like it was the best conversation you've ever had.
The best way to predict the future is to create it.
The brightest future will always be based on a forgotten past. You can't go on well in life until you let go of your past failures and heartaches.
The quality of life is in the mind, not in material.
The world is filled with beauty when your heart is filled with love!
Think big thoughts, but relish small pleasures.
Teach yourself to speak slowly but think quickly.
To the world you may be one person, but to one person you may be the world.
Trust in God but lock your car.
Watch for big problems. They disguise big opportunities.
We grow because we struggle, we learn, and we overcome.
What's right isn't always popular, and what's popular isn't always what's right.
When someone asks you a question you don't want to answer, smile and ask, "Why do you want to know?"
When the door of happiness closes, another opens, but oftentimes we look so long at the closed door that we don't see the one which has been opened for us.
When you delight in the game, the effort seems unimportant.
When you lose, don't lose the lesson.
When you realize you've made a mistake, take immediate steps to correct it.
When you say, "I love you," mean it.
When you say, "I'm sorry", look the person in the eye.
When you were born, you were crying and everyone around you was smiling. Live your life so that when you die, you're the one who is smiling and everyone around you is crying.
When you have nothing to say, say nothing.
Where the sun always shines, there's a desert below.
Worry gives a small thing a big shadow.
You've got to dance like nobody's watching and love like it's never going to hurt.

Random Hints

When there is a good chance that someone will be taking pictures be sure that you don't wear white near your face or the glare will make you look like Casper the friendly ghost.
To loosen the lid of a jar, run it under hot water for a minute.
To save time, videotape or DVR your favorite shows and fast-forward through the commercials.
If you will soak a dirty pan in warm soapy water for a few minutes, the goop should wipe right off.
If you let your spray cleaner stay on a dried up spot for a minute, again, the goop should wipe off easily.

More Lessons Learned

Lessons Learned from: Alias, Angel, BtVS, life,
love, MacGyver, songs, movies, and TV

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